?

Log in

09 March 2009 @ 03:39 pm
I am the most inconsistent LJ poster ever, aren't I?
 
 
02 December 2008 @ 05:17 pm
*smiles* I have blue panties on under my boy clothes.

I want to say something, but I'm not sure what. I wish I knew for sure whether or not my ex is actually going to take the kids for some of Christmas break. I'd schedule some girl time if I knew.

I guess I just wrote here because I feel like connecting with someone who knows. Even if I don't know what to say.
 
 
29 November 2008 @ 07:49 pm
I feel a desperate need to feel pretty right now.

I don't what that will take though.
 
 
26 November 2008 @ 10:43 am
I realized today I haven't updated in a while.

Well, I pulled myself off the Climera for a while back in October. Money is really tight, so, I decided to save money that way. And I figured, since I wasn't losing weight on the Climera, I might have better luck while off of it and then get better results when I went back on.

Well, I still don't have the money to go back on the Climera right now. And I haven't lost weight. :(

I was getting up earling and working out every morning while on the patches and had done so for the last 8 weeks. Less than a week after I stopped wearing them, I had dropped my workout routine. I've tried a couple times, but I just haven't been able to get it going ever since. Its a day here and a day there. Although, that said, I haven't gained any weight since stopping.

(Of course, I wasn't losing any on the patches while working out.)

Anyway, if anyone has twitter, I'm on there now as lostgirley.

And I'll try and update more regularly.
 
 
10 September 2008 @ 02:35 pm
I disdapeared again.

The Climara is working it's magic on me. I haven't done measurements in a long time, I really need to do some again. :)

Just life as usual. But I still need to go get some new panties. Hmmmm.
 
 
 
13 August 2008 @ 07:23 am
I do love using it. It is the first thing to get me consistantly working out, possibly ever.

That said, I wish I could trust it when it is weighing me. As I mentioned, I have had several people comment on my weight recently; however, when I checked in yesterday, it said I was down more than 10 lbs in that time period. Whereas, yesterday, I worked out, didn't drink and ate mostly healthy and it said I jumped almost 5 lbs in 24 hours.

Which is frustrating. I like the way it gets me to work and honestly, over time, I think looking at my weight trend will be useful on it. I just wish I could trust it for accurate daily progress.
 
 
11 August 2008 @ 09:13 pm
Wow! Yeah, I need to change the timing on the patches. Mood swings from hell, that have at least twice put me into tears last night.

Issues with the younger daughter at school yesterday, first I was raving at her, then I was crying about "what am I doing wrong," then ok for a bit, then I said "I was going to be good tonight, but I want a drink." my SO said, "I think you deserve it." which set me off to crying again.

Yeah, thanks, I'll do without the sudden drop in hormones. I put on two patches this morning, I'll probably switch one of them out early or Fri or Saturday...
 
 
11 August 2008 @ 03:33 pm
I really need to go back to staggering out my patches.

Originally, I had them spaced out where one changed every 3 or 4 days. So, even though there is a dip in the hormone level as time wears on, it would keep things *pretty* even. So there's not a huge drop as the patches wear out.

Somehow, I got things messed up somewhere along the way and they have ended up being changed on the same day in recent weeks. And I think I'm definitely noticing the drop in hormone levels.

I'm on my last day of these patches today. By breasts are still tender, but my nipples don't seem to have that magic sensitivity I'm used to. :(

Maybe I'll change both today and then change one again in three or four days, rather than dealing with several days at a lower hormone level...that sounds like a plan.
 
 
11 August 2008 @ 02:02 pm
When I was doing the measurements, part of what I was doing was tracking my growth, part of what I was doing was seeing how I was doing in weight loss.

Up until our vacation, I had gotten for the first time in ages, consistent about working out. There have been changes to diet made as well, smaller portions of meat and healthier options at the dinner table.

Well, the dietary changes have stuck, but the exercise went away with the vacation. I had been getting up at 5:30 in the morning to work out with the Wii fit, along with a few other exercises. Between the time zone changes and the driving all night, I royally fucked up my sleep schedule. I've gotten sleep sorta back to normal, only it's closer to 5:45 or 6 when I get up now. Throw in that the kids started back school shortly after vacation and it's made mornings a lot more hectic. I tried this morning getting up at 5:30. It didn't work, of course, it didn't help that I didn't get home from waiting tables until almost 11:30 last night. I'll try again tomorrow and maybe try to go to bed earlier tonight.

The other thing, that I am sure is affecting my weight, is drinking. Not that I have more than one or two in an evening, but there's something about alcohol that seems to always seems to glue the weight to my body. I need to cut it back again, it's just a cocktail feels so nice after a long stressful day...

But what this all leads to is I've gained a good deal of weight, I'm not sure how much, but I've had my mom and at least one co-worker has made comments about it. Unfortunately, most of this weight gain has been in my tummy, which doesn't do much for my girlish figure, if I ever get around to going out dressed again. I think it's helped with some boobage as well, but I don't know that for sure. My gainage in the girls could be attributed to upping my dosage from two Climara 50s to one 50 and one 100 to two 100s.

I'm just frustrated with my waistline right now. I know what I need to do, drastically slash alcohol and go back to working out. You'd think as much as I want that figure, it would be easier to motivate myself to do something about it...
 
 
11 August 2008 @ 12:13 pm
...just dunno what to say lately.